January 25, 2025

A sacred frame of redemption. I am sitting in my hotel room, glued to the television, watching as Daniela, Karina, Naama and Liri return home. I am crying just as I did last week at the arrival of hostages kept in torturous horror for so very long, just imagining what it must feel like for them to hold their parents after all this time. And I am in utter anguish knowing the continuing torture of the other 90; and their families who are literally being terrorized by Hamas as they continue to play the worst kind of mind games possible.

And I hope the media at home is covering just what a charade Hamas put on as the transfer was made with the Red Cross. I know it looked crowded with Hamas militants, masked in uniform with machine guns. They want to show that they are still in power the way they were 15 months ago. Israeli media pointed out that none of them have been in uniform for a year. They all cowardly dressed as civilians, and hid behind innocents so it would make it impossible not to injure or kill those who were put in the way by their own leaders. Apparently, if the camera shot panned back, there were not more assembled than the 1,000 or so that were brought in to perform the illusion.

Okay, enough….my point of writing above, “A sacred frame of redemption”, because that is how our trip began, and it is ending. We began last Sunday, our group arriving to Israel, as the first three hostages were crossing the border, home; and in a few hours, we will fly home as the 4 hostages came home today. I don’t know what better way we might arrive and leave….well, except to have the other 90 come home….NOW!

Okay, so we are coming to a close here. It feels so hard to leave. We have had such a deep and intense mission. Yesterday we met with our last speaker of the week, the head of Israel’s major trauma center. They are therapists who’s only job it is to counsel citizens trying to navigate the trauma of the past 15 months. She spoke to us about how so much trust has been broken. Trust between citizen and army/government. Trust between parents and children, who told their kids like we all do that they would keep them safe, but they could not. Trust that one’s home would be a safe place. These therapists are so deep in, that there is a whole other cadre of therapists to counsel them from the trauma they are experiencing. She wanted you all to know that there is a different way of speaking about trauma that we might want to utilize: “We are not traumatized (meaning that is not what defines us), but we are a country that was exposed to great trauma.” And yet, with all of the hope and broken trust, she showed a sensitive determination….a determination that says: We are a nation that is totally vulnerable and perhaps broken, but we are working at putting the pieces back together. We are building strength and resilience, so that we can transform to a new normal. Not to bounce back to what used to be, but to bounce forward to what we will build in our new manifestation of life. A vital visit, one that came at the urging of my wise wife!

Joel took the group on a tour of the Old City…..I say the group because I excused myself because I scheduled to meet with a couple of colleagues……some compelling new things we are working on for our congregation and future trips. I have pictures to share (Old City), but you will have to hear from them on the details of what I am sure was a magnificent tour.

And now we will gather for our final reflection session, to somehow put all of it in perspective. My perspective, for sure not all is not coherent enough to put in a nicely wrapped package. But here is a start.

Counterintuitively, we find relief in the midst of complexity. Somehow being here, as hard and complex as it, surprisingly gives much more clarity than we have back at home. At home, we have to read through so much media noise; and have to navigate through all of the western projection that we put onto a place that just doesn’t reflect the lens through which we see the world. Yes, this is our Homeland, but it exists in a very different neighborhood than the one in which we dwell. Here, we start to see through an Israeli lens. Or at least we can hear raw, firsthand information. I don’t pretend to suddenly be an expert, but seeing things through primary sources changes the metric of understanding. The paradox is real. At points we felt utterly depressed because we thought we had found a country without hope, just to be surprised at the depth of hope and resilience that inspired us. It felt at certain points that there will never be away out; and then it was and is clear, that there are innovative ways of building a future, thoughts of creating a tighter fabric than the one that feels so torn. A hope that is not made of the make believe, but of an honest reckoning and a strength to see the challenges with eyes wide open.

We learned or at least were reminded of the imperative, the human imperative that we have no choice, but to hold several conflicting truths in our one communal container. We learned that living in that conflictual state is existentially and exponentially anxiety provoking. And that feels spiritually exhausting. But pretending that everything is cut and dry; black and white doesn’t give any of us a shot at attaining the kind of wisdom we need to navigate our way forward. And, indeed, we don’t have the luxury of inertia.

We have more work to do at home. Last year, our project and relationship with Nir Oz grew out of our mission and just look at how much and how deeply that has grown and will continue to do so. The same will come from this mission. We will be announcing new and vital projects with which we will ask our community to engage just as deeply as we did last year. Please stay tuned. And please do remember to come to Shabbat Services next Friday night to hear from us; and then Sunday after that (February 2nd at 9:45 AM) to hear more first-hand testimony from members of our group.

Without the magnificent leadership of our Chair, Debbie Evans; Rena Abrams and Matt Turk, this would not have been what it was. You were all superlative in your love, wisdom, devotion and patience. It was a lot….and it was all worth it because of who you are as human beings. And my goodness, Joel, my dear, dear friend, you did it again. You led us not just with smarts and insight, but with a sense of humanity that allowed us to look deeper than we could have ever imagined. You lovingly held us; prodded us; and made sure that every nuance was made clear. We are lucky that you are our guide and friend. One of a kind.

And to our group of solidarity warriors, it was a privilege to travel with you. You are brave, insightful, eager, devoted, generous, compassionate, curious and steadfast Zionists. We brushed up against situations we knew were possible, but didn’t believe we would encounter. You handled it all with such poise and not one of you allowed it to deter our course of mission. You brought such love and compassion to every Israeli we encountered. They embraced you because of the love and healing you brought them. You allowed yourselves to be vulnerable; open to the trauma and exhaustion of our brothers and sisters, even as it tore us apart. You kept on expressing hope; found ways to laugh, cry, connected deeply to one another and I think the fabric of your spirits changed in ways you and I will carry for the rest of our days on this earth. Thank you for reminding me with such clarity about the imperative of my calling. You renewed me as much as being in Israel always does.

And to all of you who have continued to read this space for the past 10 days, thank you for giving me a place to process my convoluted thoughts. You enabled me to get at least some clarity and in turn, I hope you felt like you were with us. We felt you!

Am Yisrael Chai!