July 18, 2025

It amazes what comes back to me in Hebrew, words that once fluently existed within me somehow drained through the sieve; only to return when they suddenly become situationally necessary. I once knew the word ‏שגרה, “routine”, but I guess since I didn’t use it, so I lost it. That is, until this visit. Now I hear the word used in a myriad of manners at least 10 times a day. It might even (remains still to be seen) be the defining word of my time here.

There is the routine that existed before October 7th. The trauma which somehow became routine. The routine of living without a missing member of the family, either gone, or away in uniform for months at a time. The routine of an ongoing war in Gaza. The routine of Houthi missiles fired and shot down. The routine of running to the bomb shelter. A routine interrupted by new wars in Lebanon. In Iran. In Syria. And now, in Syria again. The routine of worrying about world Jewry under the threat of virulent antisemitism. A routine of demonstrations, demanding the return of hostages. And so, that means also a routine for hostages being beaten, starved and tortured. Routine of wearing yellow ribbons and dog tags, routinely shaking ourselves so we don’t allow ourselves to get used to the notion of captivity. A routine of being forced to kill to defend. A routine of killing that will never leave the consciousness of a generation of soldiers who have done and seen things for which almost no parent would advocate. A routine of not knowing what the endgame is; if political leaders can be trusted to do what is best for society. The routine of acute polarization. And how can we not imagine a routine for Gazans noncombatants who search for shelter, food and medicine….more to say about this below.

All of us know how important routine is to the managing of our lives. When managed healthily, it allows us to expediently deal with the menial, so we have room for the creative; for depth of thought; for advancement on our paths of life. And so, I am moved by how much I hear about the routine that was utterly disrupted for the 12 days of war with Iran. A war that was only thought about in nightmares because of the evil and fear that the Iranian regime represented, suddenly became the reality. It was “only” 12 days, but it felt like it might go on for months. And indeed, each day felt like a month. Those 12 days have been described to me as a marriage between Covid and the beginning of the war 20 months ago. Meaning, lockdown with no social gatherings and constant fear of being hit with a missile. Given that literally any place in the country could be hit; given the unbelievable power of 1.5 tons worth of ballistic might, given that massive damage was being wrought, all sense of routine went up in smoke.

And then one day, it ended. At least the current military conflict with Iran did. The US attacked and within 24 hours the 12 days of terror ended. And what happened? The government announced that the next day, kids should return to school and adults were expected at work. There wasn’t any time to process what happened. No time to think about 20,000 people who would not have their homes back for at least a year. No, it was time to go back to routine of school and work. And so, routine was either hinderance or disguise. Some couldn’t fathom how the heck they were supposed to pretend that nothing had actually happened. And others, admitted to me that they the routine of work helped them pretend that everything was okay; that being productive at work just made them be able to escape from the reality of what just happened and what is still happening in the “old routine”, a war that has now dragged for over 20 months.

Routine is mandatory for we humans, but how we utilize, how we hide, how we habituate, how we stay aware of the moral imperative, how we don’t forget and become sterile to it all is one of the clarifying lessons of my time.

Just a couple of more things to add before Shabbat comes:
The hostages are languishing, and we cannot forget. I will be in Tel Aviv tomorrow night with countless others sending that message loud and clear.

Several polls were just released here that report that 83%, yes, 83% of the Israeli public believes it is time for the war in Gaza to end. That is not Right or Left, that number obviously represents the Middle plus! The sense from everyone I speak to is not that Hamas should continue to exist, no one wants that, but that there is not much left to accomplish militarily. It is time to turn to diplomacy with allies both here and in the West and end the war. Israeli society is weary and tired. Soldiers have been fighting for too long. The trauma needs to be processed. The victories have been substantial, and it is time for a next stage.

There is a growing sense that even though it is complicated to find empathy after the horrors perpetrated by Hamas, and we have every right to do what is necessary, given that Hamas has put anyone who might be innocent in harm’s way….yet, still, there is a moral obligation to feed the hungry, heal the wounded and start to reimagine what peaceful routine might look like on the Day After…… I have my own views on all of this, but for the sake of this space, I am reporting what I am hearing from friends and associates on all parts of the political spectrum. Please, don’t react right away, just take in what I have been hearing and reporting to you.

Lauren left a few days ago and is back home now with Jake and Sadie. I miss her after spending such meaningful time. I am so lucky to be married to her. That leaves Talia and me. But quite honestly, Talia is much more interested in being with her Israeli friends and her best friend from home than with me…as it should be.
I study, volunteer, spend time with all kinds of folk; and have been with a couple of classmates who I haven’t seen in way too long. And even got to the opening of the Jerusalem Film Festival….too many speeches, a long, slow, but compelling film and I even got to see Gal Gadot!

My goodness, I still feel like I haven’t told you anything. Thanks for continuing to follow… it means so much to me…
Shabbat Shalom and love from Jerusalem,

Matthew